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| When the leaves turn... |
| 09.18.06 (9:11 pm) [edit] |
|
For many years, we celebrated the arrival of fall with a trip to Lemon Creek Winery in Berrien Springs, Michigan. We happened upon it one year by accident while on a drive in the country looking for apples and pumpkins. Year after year, the ritual remained the same. We would go to the tasting area for some samples and then each of us would get a glass while the girls picked out which sparkling juice they wanted and we’d head out toward the orchard.. Our requirements were generally 2-3 bushel baskets each of apples and concord grapes…enough to make applesauce, apple-butter, apple jelly, and grape jelly the next day. The car smelled wonderful on the drive home. Following this we would look for a pumpkin patch. Pumpkin picking was no simple matter. Megan, of course, had to have the largest, heaviest pumpkin on the lot and Ali didn’t stop looking until she found one that satisfied her acute sense of aesthetic and proportion. Our final destination would be to Tabor Hill Winery in Baroda, Michigan where we would have a delicious dinner and stock up on wine to take home. After the divorce, these fall trips stopped; it just didn’t seem right to pretend that everything was like it used to be. In the fall of 2004, I felt that it was time to revisit the orchard experience—it wouldn’t be the same, but it would be what we made it. Ali had a radiation appointment so Megan met us at the hospital. I didn’t tell them where we were going but, it didn’t take long for them to guess. We picked our grapes and apples and found our way to some pumpkins before heading to Tabor Hill. I’ll never forget that night. For me it was magical and I saw them with new eyes. In the middle of dinner it became clear to me that without even trying it had changed from a family outing to girls night out. We were three women talking over the glow of candlelight…tellin g secrets, laughing…and yes, shamelessly flirting with the waiter. We talked until the sky grew dark and the rows of grapes were just shadows in the moonlight. They thanked me countless times on the way home and I could tell that they were genuinely grateful. Part of it stemmed from the fact that I could barely afford gas for the car, let alone dinner at Tabor Hill. But there was more to it. It was one of those moments in your life when you know that something special has just occurred and it was reflected in the sound of our voices all the way home. We had pulled a precious piece of our history from the rubble of divorce. We shaped it into something new and different—something all our own and beautiful. That would be our last time at the orchard. Ali died less than six months later. When the leaves begin to turn, I think of that night. It is the closest I will ever come to having a grown-up night out with both of my daughters. Sometimes I think about going back, but, it would be as though I were treading on sacred ground. Some things aren’t meant to be resurrected. God gave us memories that we might have roses in December. ~J.M. Barrie, Courage, 1922 |
posted by: Kayla (reply)
post date: 09.18.06 (6:28 pm)
Oh Lori..
I just finished catching up pn all your blogs on both of your sites... I don't really know what to say, other than I love reading your stuff. I've been having a weird day and reading all this made me feel better and worse all at the same time. I love your memories.. and just your family.. period. But I miss you all like crazy. Just wanted to tell you.
posted by: thecyberwriter (reply)
post date: 09.18.06 (6:31 pm)
What a lovely post, lori! I love fall - it's by far, my favorite time of the year :-) I know what you mean about a divoce throwing a wrench in these fun events....I went through something similiar, but then I realized that maybe it was just time to make new memories..... :-) Thanks for sharing this!!
posted by: akelso (reply)
post date: 09.18.06 (7:01 pm)
Thank you for keeping this blog, and for offering it to the universe of humanity this way. I am deeply touched. Ali was I'm certain blessed for having been your daughter, and most certainly proud of her mother.
- ak
posted by: judypatooote (reply)
post date: 09.19.06 (5:18 am)
I just love your heading....and for those who don't know me I want to say "THOSE ARE MY GRANDDAUGHTERS, AND I'M DAM PROUD OF IT".
You started that wonderful tradition of going to the apple orchard and gather pictures along with the apples.....now I get to enjoy that tradition with Linda.... This was a beautiful memory Lori, aren't we lucky to have had them.......mumsy
posted by: 69whisper (reply)
post date: 09.19.06 (7:22 am)
i will comment a little later.
posted by: 69whisper (reply)
post date: 09.19.06 (9:29 pm)
what a love post it is. memories, sweet or bitter, thats all what one has. and there is a time when even the bitter meomories turn into sugarcakes.
posted by: lorischuster (reply)
post date: 09.20.06 (8:55 am)
Reply to: Kayla...so nice to see your name. :) We saw each other every day and now...never! Hope school is going well for you. It's hard to think about how it all was so wonderful. Odd--but wonderful. You were good to tolerate me. I miss you too...and I will be calling you back.
posted by: lorischuster (reply)
post date: 09.20.06 (8:57 am)
Reply to: thecyberwriter
Thank you. Fall is my favorite season too. I love everything about it. It already seems like October up here. You are right...you need to make new memories...take a little of the old and a little of the new and make something wonderful out of it. Thanks for your comment.
posted by: lorischuster (reply)
post date: 09.20.06 (9:00 am)
Reply to: akelso
Thank you for such a nice comment. It touched me and I appreciate what you said. This blog is my therapy I think and it's nice that people care enough to read and comment.
posted by: lorischuster (reply)
post date: 09.20.06 (9:02 am)
Reply to: judy
Mom! You said dam! :) So glad I have the pictures. Wish I had one for the last time...but oh well. The apple orchard is a great tradition...I'm glad you get to do it with Jensie and Christopher. Love you.
posted by: lorischuster (reply)
post date: 09.20.06 (9:07 am)
Reply to: 69whisper You are right...they are what we have. I really don't dwell on the past as much as it seems because when I do...it is generally on this blog. I work through it when I write. It is definitely bittersweet...but it is just a fact of life. How terrible it would have been not to have them. It gets a little better...a little easier every day. So nice of you to stop by and cheer me.
Grace, beauty, humor, strength.
Alison Haley Cloud
Nov. 16, 1987-March 1, 2005
